Losing Out

Everyday Life, Memories

We lost the proposal that I was hoping we’d win. Kind of a bummer for me, because that project kept me busy and I was controlling my own destiny a bit. Feeling a little depressed over it actually. The firm that won I didn’t think did the kind of work they were asking for, and for more money, so I’m not sure what the decision process was – maybe they were just sick of us after almost 10 years. Maybe it’ll bite them someday, but probably not. I personally think they made a mistake, and not to toot my own horn, but there’s no way they’ll get the same level of service that I was giving them, at least not at first. But it wasn’t up to me, and they’ll survive. The question is will I? Where do I go from here? I’ll have to try to find some other stuff to do.

Working for a consulting firm kinda sucks sometimes. Oftentimes I wish I could just work at a job where you know what it is day in and day out, and you don’t have to worry about billing and getting your utilization numbers up all the time. I not really complaining too much though – in a lot of ways it has been a dream job for me.. That’s what was nice about this project though – it kept me safe. Perhaps, I’ve become too complacent, and if so, then that’s all on me. Then again, maybe I’m being overly dramatic. Perhaps something positive could occur out of all this. New opportunities could lie ahead. I guess I just don’t like that it wasn’t on my terms.

We have a friend flying in from out of state to visit for a while, so it might be a nice distraction for a day or two. Meanwhile, the city is jack hammering the street out in front of the house in preparation for repaving it. Loud and annoying.

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